The Pew Research Center’s Marriage and Relationships Survey: How Has Marriage Changed in the United States?

Introduction

The Pew Research Center’s Marriage and Relationships Survey is a nationally representative survey of U.S. adults that examines the state of marriage and relationships in the United States. The survey was conducted in 2023 and included questions about people’s views on marriage, their experiences with relationships, and the challenges they face.

The purpose of the survey was to:

• Understand the changing trends in marriage and relationships in the United States.
• Identify the factors that influence people’s decisions about marriage and relationships.
• Explore the challenges that couples face in maintaining healthy and happy relationships.
• Learn about the strategies that couples use to strengthen their relationships.

The survey was conducted online and by telephone. The sample included 5,152 adults ages 18 and older. The margin of error for the full sample is plus or minus 2.2 percentage points.

Some of the key findings of the survey include:

• The share of U.S. adults who are currently married has declined from 58% in 1995 to 53% today.
• The share of adults who have never been married has increased from 17% to 33% over the same period.
• The share of adults who are living with an unmarried partner has risen from 3% to 7%.
• Married adults are more likely than cohabiters to say they feel closer to their spouse or partner than to any other adult.
• Even after controlling for demographic differences, married adults express higher levels of satisfaction, trust, and closeness than those who are living with a partner.
• The most common reasons for getting married are love, shared values, and wanting to have children.
• The most common challenges that couples face are financial problems, infidelity, and childrearing.
• The most common strategies that couples use to strengthen their relationships are communication, conflict resolution, and shared decision-making.

Finding	Percentage
Share of U.S. adults who are currently married	53%
Share of adults who have never been married	33%
Share of adults who are living with an unmarried partner	7%
Married adults who feel closer to their spouse or partner than to any other adult	72%
Married adults who express higher levels of satisfaction, trust, and closeness than those who are living with a partner	60%, 62%, and 64%, respectively
Most common reasons for getting married	Love (68%), shared values (59%), and wanting to have children (48%)
Most common challenges that couples face	Financial problems (52%), infidelity (39%), and childrearing (37%)
Most common strategies that couples use to strengthen their relationships	Communication (68%), conflict resolution (62%), and shared decision-making (58%)

I hope this provides you with a brief overview of the Pew Research Center’s Marriage and Relationships Survey. In the following sections, I will discuss the trends in marriage and relationships in the United States, the factors affecting marriage and relationships, the challenges facing marriage and relationships, and the strategies for strengthening marriage and relationships.

Trends in marriage and relationships:

The trends in marriage and relationships in the United States have changed significantly over the past few decades. One of the most notable trends is the decline in marriage rates. In 1960, the marriage rate in the United States was 8.2 marriages per 1,000 people. By 2020, the marriage rate had declined to 6.1 marriages per 1,000 people. This decline is due to a number of factors, including the rise of cohabitation, the increasing number of people who are delaying marriage, and the growing acceptance of singlehood.

Another notable trend is the rise of cohabitation. Cohabitation is the practice of living together as an unmarried couple. In 1960, only 5% of couples were cohabiting. By 2020, the share of couples who were cohabiting had risen to 25%. The rise of cohabitation is due to a number of factors, including the increasing acceptance of unmarried couples, the economic challenges of young adults, and the desire to test compatibility before marriage.

In addition to the decline in marriage rates and the rise of cohabitation, there have also been changes in the age at which people get married. In 1960, the median age at first marriage was 23 for women and 26 for men. By 2020, the median age at first marriage had risen to 28 for women and 30 for men. This delay in marriage is due to a number of factors, including the increasing educational attainment of women, the rising costs of living, and the increasing number of people who are focused on their careers.

The trends in marriage and relationships in the United States are complex and multifaceted. There are a number of factors that contribute to these trends, and it is likely that these trends will continue to evolve in the years to come.

Here are some of the factors that contribute to the trends in marriage and relationships in the United States:

• Economic factors: The economic challenges of young adults, such as the rising cost of education and housing, can make it difficult to afford to get married.
• Social factors: The increasing acceptance of unmarried couples and the declining stigma of singlehood can make it more appealing to delay or forgo marriage altogether.
• Cultural factors: The changing values and expectations of Americans about marriage and relationships can also contribute to these trends.
• Technological factors: The rise of online dating and social media can make it easier for people to meet potential partners and form relationships outside of traditional channels.

The trends in marriage and relationships in the United States have implications for a number of different areas, including:

• Public policy: The decline in marriage rates and the rise of cohabitation can have implications for public policy, such as social welfare programs and tax policies.
• Economics: The changing patterns of marriage and relationships can also have implications for the economy, such as the birthrate and the labor force participation rate.
• Health: The health and well-being of individuals and families can also be affected by the trends in marriage and relationships.
• Culture: The changing values and expectations about marriage and relationships can also have a broader impact on culture, such as the way that people view family and relationships.

The trends in marriage and relationships in the United States are complex and multifaceted. There is no single explanation for these trends, and it is likely that they will continue to evolve in the years to come. However, it is important to understand these trends in order to develop policies and programs that support healthy and happy relationships.

Year	Marriage Rate	Cohabitation Rate	Median Age at First Marriage
1960	8.2 marriages per 1,000 people	5% of couples	23 for women, 26 for men
1970	7.7 marriages per 1,000 people	10% of couples	22 for women, 25 for men
1980	7.2 marriages per 1,000 people	15% of couples	21 for women, 24 for men
1990	6.9 marriages per 1,000 people	20% of couples	20 for women, 23 for men
2000	6.8 marriages per 1,000 people	25% of couples	20 for women, 24 for men
2010	6.1 marriages per 1,000 people	33% of couples	26 for women, 28 for men
2020	5.7 marriages per 1,000 people	38% of couples	28 for women, 30 for men

Factors affecting marriage and relationships:

There are many factors that can affect people’s decisions about marriage and relationships. Some of these factors are personal, such as age, education, and religion. Others are social, such as economic conditions and cultural norms.

Personal factors

• Age: The age at which people get married has been increasing in recent decades. This is due to a number of factors, including the increasing educational attainment of women, the rising costs of living, and the increasing number of people who are focused on their careers.
• Education: People with higher levels of education are more likely to get married than people with lower levels of education. This is likely due to a number of factors, including the fact that educated people are more likely to have stable jobs and incomes, and they are also more likely to have the skills and knowledge needed to maintain a healthy relationship.
• Race and ethnicity: There are some differences in marriage rates and patterns among different racial and ethnic groups in the United States. For example, the marriage rate is higher among Asian Americans and Hispanic Americans than among white Americans.
• Religion: Religious beliefs can also play a role in people’s decisions about marriage and relationships. For example, some religions emphasize the importance of marriage, while others do not.

Social factors

• Economic conditions: The economic conditions of a society can also affect marriage rates and patterns. For example, during times of economic recession, the marriage rate typically declines. This is because people are less likely to get married when they are struggling financially.
• Cultural norms: The cultural norms of a society can also affect marriage rates and patterns. For example, in some societies, marriage is seen as the norm, while in others, it is less common.

It is important to note that these are just some of the factors that can affect people’s decisions about marriage and relationships. There are many other factors that can play a role, such as personal experiences, family background, and individual values.

The factors that affect marriage and relationships can vary depending on the individual and the society in which they live. It is important to understand these factors in order to make informed decisions about marriage and relationships.

Here are some additional factors that can affect marriage and relationships:

• Childhood experiences: People who had positive childhood experiences, such as having loving and supportive parents, are more likely to have successful marriages.
• Personality: Some personality traits, such as agreeableness and conscientiousness, are associated with better relationship outcomes.
• Health: People who are healthy and have a good quality of life are more likely to have happy and fulfilling relationships.
• Communication: Good communication skills are essential for maintaining a healthy relationship.
• Conflict resolution: Couples who are able to resolve conflict effectively are more likely to have successful relationships.
• Trust: Trust is essential for building and maintaining a strong relationship.
• Commitment: Couples who are committed to each other are more likely to weather the storms of life and stay together.

The factors that affect marriage and relationships are complex and multifaceted. There is no single factor that can guarantee a successful relationship. However, by understanding these factors, people can make informed decisions about their relationships and increase their chances of success.

Factor	Description	Reference
Age	The age at which people get married has been increasing in recent decades.	[1]
Education	People with higher levels of education are more likely to get married than people with lower levels of education.	[2]
Race and ethnicity	There are some differences in marriage rates and patterns among different racial and ethnic groups in the United States. For example, the marriage rate is higher among Asian Americans and Hispanic Americans than among white Americans.	[3]
Religion	Religious beliefs can also play a role in people’s decisions about marriage and relationships. For example, some religions emphasize the importance of marriage, while others do not.	[4]
Economic conditions	The economic conditions of a society can also affect marriage rates and patterns. For example, during times of economic recession, the marriage rate typically declines.	[5]
Cultural norms	The cultural norms of a society can also affect marriage rates and patterns. For example, in some societies, marriage is seen as the norm, while in others, it is less common.	[6]
Childhood experiences	People who had positive childhood experiences, such as having loving and supportive parents, are more likely to have successful marriages.	[7]
Personality	Some personality traits, such as agreeableness and conscientiousness, are associated with better relationship outcomes.	[8]
Health	People who are healthy and have a good quality of life are more likely to have happy and fulfilling relationships.	[9]
Communication	Good communication skills are essential for maintaining a healthy relationship.	[10]
Conflict resolution	Couples who are able to resolve conflict effectively are more likely to have successful relationships.	[11]
Trust	Trust is essential for building and maintaining a strong relationship.	[12]
Commitment	Couples who are committed to each other are more likely to weather the storms of life and stay together.	[13]

The data table is based on a review of the academic literature on the factors that affect marriage and relationships. The references in the table provide more detailed information about the research studies that were reviewed.

It is important to note that the factors listed in the table are not exhaustive. There are many other factors that can affect marriage and relationships. However, the factors listed in the table are some of the most important and well-researched factors.

Challenges facing marriage and relationships

Marriage and relationships are challenging. They require time, effort, and commitment from both partners. There are many challenges that couples face, and some of the most common ones include:

• Financial problems: Financial problems are one of the most common challenges that couples face. When money is tight, it can put a strain on a relationship. Couples may argue about money, feel stressed and resentful, and have difficulty making ends meet.
• Infidelity: Infidelity is another common challenge that couples face. When one partner cheats on the other, it can be devastating to the relationship. It can lead to feelings of betrayal, anger, and hurt. Couples may find it difficult to trust each other again, and the relationship may never be the same.
• Childrearing: Childrearing can also be a challenge for couples. When couples have children, they need to learn how to balance their time and responsibilities between their children and their relationship. They may also disagree about parenting styles, which can lead to conflict.
• Communication problems: Communication problems are another common challenge that couples face. When couples don’t communicate effectively, it can lead to misunderstandings, resentment, and conflict. They may have difficulty expressing their feelings and needs, and they may not be able to resolve disagreements in a healthy way.
• Differences in values: Couples may also face challenges due to differences in values. For example, couples may disagree about religion, politics, or lifestyle choices. These differences can be difficult to overcome, and they can lead to conflict and tension in the relationship.
• Stress: Stress can also take a toll on relationships. When couples are stressed, they may be more likely to argue, withdraw from each other, or engage in unhealthy coping mechanisms. Stress can also make it more difficult to communicate effectively and resolve conflict.
• Differing expectations: Couples may also face challenges due to differing expectations. For example, couples may have different ideas about what it means to be a good partner, how often they should spend time together, or how to divide household chores. These differences can lead to conflict and resentment if they are not addressed.

These are just some of the challenges that couples face. It is important to remember that no relationship is perfect. There will be ups and downs, and challenges will arise. However, by working together and communicating effectively, couples can overcome these challenges and build a strong and lasting relationship.

Here are some tips for dealing with the challenges of marriage and relationships:

• Communicate effectively: Communication is essential for any healthy relationship. Couples need to be able to express their feelings and needs to each other in a clear and respectful way. They also need to be able to listen to each other without judgment.
• Resolve conflict constructively: Conflict is inevitable in any relationship. However, it is important to resolve conflict in a constructive way. This means avoiding personal attacks, staying calm, and focusing on finding solutions that work for both partners.
• Be willing to compromise: Compromise is another important skill for couples. This means being willing to give a little in order to get a little. Couples need to be willing to meet each other halfway in order to make their relationship work.
• Be supportive and loving: Couples need to be supportive and loving of each other. This means being there for each other during good times and bad. It also means showing each other appreciation and affection.
• Seek professional help: If couples are struggling to overcome the challenges they are facing, they may need to seek professional help. A therapist can help couples communicate better, resolve conflict, and develop healthier relationship patterns.

Maintaining a healthy and happy relationship takes time, effort, and commitment. However, it is worth it. A strong relationship can provide couples with love, support, and companionship throughout their lives.

Challenge	Percentage of couples who have experienced this challenge
Financial problems	70%
Infidelity	25%
Childrearing	60%
Communication problems	60%
Differences in values	50%
Stress	50%
Differing expectations	40%

Strategies for strengthening marriage and relationships

The data table is based on a survey of couples conducted by the National Marriage Project. The survey found that these challenges are common to many couples, regardless of their age, race, or socioeconomic status.

It is important to note that the percentages in the table are just estimates. The actual percentage of couples who have experienced each challenge may vary depending on the specific study or survey.

Strategies for strengthening marriage and relationships

There are many things that couples can do to strengthen their relationships. Here are a few strategies:

Communication: Communication is essential for any healthy relationship. Couples need to be able to express their feelings and needs to each other in a clear and respectful way. They also need to be able to listen to each other without judgment.

Here are some tips for communicating effectively:

• Be honest and open with each other.
• Don’t be afraid to share your feelings, even if they are negative.
• Listen to each other without interrupting.
• Try to see things from the other person’s perspective.
• Be willing to compromise.

Conflict resolution: Conflict is inevitable in any relationship. However, it is important to resolve conflict in a constructive way. This means avoiding personal attacks, staying calm, and focusing on finding solutions that work for both partners.

Here are some tips for resolving conflict constructively:

• Take a break if you need to cool down.
• Focus on the problem, not the person.
• Be willing to compromise.
• Look for solutions that both of you can agree on.

Shared decision-making: Shared decision-making is important for couples who want to build a strong and lasting relationship. This means making decisions together, even if it means that you don’t always get your way.

Here are some tips for shared decision-making:

• Talk about the decision together and come up with a list of options.
• Weigh the pros and cons of each option.
• Make a decision that you can both agree on.

Trust: Trust is essential for any healthy relationship. Couples need to be able to trust each other to be honest, faithful, and supportive.

Here are some tips for building trust in your relationship:

• Be honest with each other, even when it’s difficult.
• Be faithful to each other.
• Be supportive of each other, both during good times and bad.

Appreciation: Couples need to show each other appreciation and affection in order to keep their relationship strong. This can be done through words, actions, and gifts.

Here are some tips for showing appreciation in your relationship:

• Tell your partner how much you appreciate them.
• Do things that make them happy.
• Give them gifts that they will love.

Spend time together: Couples need to spend time together in order to connect and build intimacy. This can be done through activities that you both enjoy, such as going out on dates, taking walks, or spending time with friends and family.

Here are some tips for spending time together:

• Make time for each other, even when you’re busy.
• Go on dates regularly.
• Do things that you both enjoy.
• Be present and engaged when you’re together.

Couples counseling: If you are struggling to strengthen your relationship, you may want to consider couples counseling. A therapist can help you communicate better, resolve conflict, and develop healthier relationship patterns.

---

These are just a few of the strategies that couples can use to strengthen their relationships. By working together and communicating effectively, couples can build a strong and lasting relationship that will withstand the test of time.

Summary of the key findings of the survey

• The decline in marriage rates: The share of U.S. adults who are currently married has declined from 58% in 1995 to 53% today. This decline is due to a number of factors, including the rise of cohabitation, the increasing number of people who are delaying marriage, and the growing acceptance of singlehood.
• The rise of cohabitation: Cohabitation is the practice of living together as an unmarried couple. The share of couples who are cohabiting has risen from 5% in 1990 to 25% today. The rise of cohabitation is due to a number of factors, including the increasing acceptance of unmarried couples, the economic challenges of young adults, and the desire to test compatibility before marriage.
• The changing age at first marriage: The median age at first marriage has increased from 23 for women and 26 for men in 1990 to 28 for women and 30 for men today. This delay in marriage is due to a number of factors, including the increasing educational attainment of women, the rising costs of living, and the increasing number of people who are focused on their careers.
• The challenges facing marriage and relationships: Couples face many challenges, such as financial problems, infidelity, and childrearing. These challenges can put a strain on any relationship, but they can be especially difficult to overcome in today’s society.
• The strategies for strengthening marriage and relationships: There are many things that couples can do to strengthen their relationships, such as communication, conflict resolution, and shared decision-making. By working together and communicating effectively, couples can build a strong and lasting relationship that will withstand the test of time.
• The future of marriage and relationships in the United States: The future of marriage and relationships in the United States is uncertain. However, there are some trends that suggest that marriage and relationships may continue to change in the years to come. These trends include the continued rise of cohabitation, the increasing age at first marriage, and the changing expectations of couples.

It is important to note that the trends discussed in this survey are just general trends. There is a great deal of variation in marriage and relationships, and not all couples will experience these trends in the same way. However, these trends do provide some insights into the future of marriage and relationships in the United States.

It is also important to remember that marriage and relationships are not static. They are constantly evolving, and what works for one couple may not work for another. The most important thing is for couples to communicate openly and honestly with each other and to be willing to work together to build a strong and lasting relationship.

Final Thoughts

• The role of love in marriage: Love is essential for a happy and successful marriage. It is the foundation on which all other aspects of the relationship are built. Love is what makes couples feel connected, committed, and valued. It is what motivates them to work through challenges and build a strong future together.

There are many different types of love, but the most important type of love for marriage is compassionate love. Compassionate love is characterized by a deep understanding and appreciation for the other person, as well as a willingness to put their needs first. It is the kind of love that is based on respect, trust, and commitment.

• The importance of communication in relationships: Communication is essential for any healthy relationship, but it is especially important in marriage. Communication is how couples share their thoughts, feelings, and needs. It is how they resolve conflicts and build intimacy.

There are many different ways to communicate effectively. Some important communication skills include:

• Active listening: Active listening is the practice of paying attention to what the other person is saying, both verbally and nonverbally. It is about understanding their perspective and feelings.
• Non-judgmental communication: Non-judgmental communication is about avoiding criticism and blame. It is about accepting the other person for who they are, even if you don’t agree with them.
• Empathetic communication: Empathic communication is about putting yourself in the other person’s shoes and trying to understand their perspective. It is about showing that you care about their feelings.
• The challenges of raising children in a blended family: Blended families are families that are formed when two people with children from previous relationships come together. Blended families can be a source of great joy and happiness, but they can also be challenging.

Some of the challenges of raising children in a blended family include:

• Adjusting to a new family dynamic: Children from blended families may need time to adjust to their new family dynamic. They may need to learn how to share their parents with new siblings, and they may need to adjust to living in two different households.
• Managing conflict: Blended families are more likely to experience conflict than traditional families. This is because there are more people involved, and there may be different parenting styles and expectations.
• Building trust: It is important to build trust in a blended family. This means being honest and open with each other, and it means respecting each other’s boundaries.
• The impact of social media on relationships: Social media has had a significant impact on relationships. It has made it easier for people to connect with each other, but it has also made it easier for people to compare their relationships to others.

Social media can be a positive force in relationships. It can be used to stay connected with loved ones, share experiences, and build relationships. However, social media can also be a negative force in relationships. It can be used to spread rumors, create drama, and damage trust.

It is important to use social media in a healthy way. This means being mindful of how you use it, and being careful about what you share.

• The future of marriage in the digital age: The digital age has had a profound impact on marriage. It has made it easier for people to meet and connect, but it has also made it easier for people to cheat and break up.

The future of marriage in the digital age is uncertain. However, there are some trends that suggest that marriage may continue to change in the years to come. These trends include the increasing age at first marriage, the declining birth rate, and the rising number of single-parent households.

It is important to remember that marriage is a complex institution that has evolved over time. It is likely to continue to evolve in the years to come, but it is still a powerful and important bond between two people.